To Combat Stress, Make Time for Self-Care
Laurie Besden, Esquire, Executive Director at Lawyers Concerned for Lawyers (LCL) presented this December 21 ethics CLE. No job in the legal profession is nine-to-five, but now the lines are blurred – we respond to email on nights and weekends, oftentimes from our phones. “We’re burned out because we feel like we need to be available all the time.”
People with mental health (MH) issues often think they don’t have a problem or that the problem lies with everyone else. One pandemic silver lining is that “we, as a profession, have normalized asking for help with MH challenges – dealing with stress, isolation, loneliness. ‘Research suggests that loneliness has the same effect on your health as smoking cigarettes daily and is even worse than being obese.’ If you had cancer/diabetes, you’d go to a doctor and get a treatment plan. You’d tell people and they’d support you. If you’re struggling with MH, why wouldn’t you ask for help?”
“Burnout involves stress, anxiety, depression, feeling overwhelmed. Because burnout isn’t a diagnosis, people think it’s normal. It usually originates because of work demands but infiltrates all aspects of our lives. It has never been more important to say: ‘here are some boundaries.’”
If your to-do list is causing stress or “if you can’t be present for one hour, look at your boundaries. If you don’t prioritize taking care of yourself, you can’t take care of clients or be there for family. Keep work compartmentalized so you can actually be with family instead of regretting two hours of lost work.”
“Healthy stress motivates us and is short-term; burnout builds over time. Signs that you’re close: tiredness or feeling detached. But, is it work, the pandemic, fear/concern about safety/health? When stress becomes distress, it’s a choice. Staying busy is a way to avoid reality and what’s going on internally.”
Are you constantly anxious, feeling overwhelmed, having obsessive thoughts or sleep disturbances? Seven/eight hours nightly is critical for success. When is the last time you turned off your phone that wasn’t for an update/reset? “We all work faster from a hard reset, but we don’t think to do it – we run ourselves to the ground and think it’ll be okay with three hours’ sleep.”
What’s the fix? Make realistic to-do lists and put yourself on them, even for downtime. “Close your eyes, take three deep breaths and visualize your muscles relaxing. It works! “Stretch [and exercise] – movement is medicine.” Meditate – there are many free apps. “Even a five-minute mediation will improve focus and calm you. Go outside for 20 minutes to connect with nature and decrease stress.” Maintain a sense of humor. Be present in conversation. Schedule screen breaks, turn off notifications, keep your phone at a distance when sleeping and/or on weekends.
Many legal professionals don’t feel safe discussing MH at work. That’s where LCL can help, offering 24/7, 365 free, safe, confidential services for lawyers, judges, family members and law students. “If you walked past somebody who was drowning, you wouldn’t say ‘hey, hope everything works out; don’t want to get involved.’ You’d never say that. It’s so important we look out for each other; you’re not turning someone in. What if you’re right and saved a life?”
And, “if someone presents to you with a problem, don’t ignore them. Be a person of action; give them a lifeline.”
LCL doesn’t report anyone anywhere. They offer free evaluations with 180+ healthcare professionals. They also have 300+ volunteer lawyers, judges and law students across PA. “Therapy and treatment are very important but having somebody who can say ‘this is what I did to get through’ is probably the greatest asset we offer.”
“There’s nothing more important than learning how to take care of yourself and carving time out for self-care. Create a plan to get through what is stressing you out so you can be present for the things in life that really matter – family, connections, relationships.” Forget broken resolutions – it’s always a good time to address self-care.
Reprinted with permission from the February 2022 edition of the Philadelphia Bar Reporter © 2022 Philadelphia Bar Association. All rights reserved. Further duplication without permission is prohibited (contact (215) 238-6300 or reporter@philabar.org).
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